Your sexual assault may have been violent, i.e. you were beaten. However bear in mind that most rape/sexual assault does not result in physical injury, and it's often the case with massage that the assaults are couched in "gentleness."

Please don't be ashamed to seek help, if you're minimizing the assault for example with thoughts like "it was only touching - why do I feel so bad?" Violent or not, all sexual assault is serious.

Society is fond of stereotypes about what "real" sexual assault is. These include nonsense myths such as : "The only real rape is stranger rape", "men are not sexually assaulted," "women ask for rape" or "it's not rape if you weren't beaten to prove you didn't consent." This results in a lot of injustice to survivors. But if you have been sexually assaulted, you deserve to be supported, believed and listened to.

Let's have a look at what rape/sexual assault is. Because the boundaries in massage are sometimes blurred, you may be unsure of how to define your experience. While you would need to check the laws in your country or state to find out what legally constitutes rape/sexual assault, here are some generally-accepted definitions:

Rape is the penetration of the vagina or anus with a finger, penis or object without consent. It also includes forced oral sex in the forms of fellatio (forcing a penis into your mouth), cunnilingus (going down on a woman) or fellating (going down on) a man without consent.

Sexual Assault is touching your breasts, buttocks, genitals or anus without consent, or the perpetrator forcing you to touch them in this way. It may involve grabbing, fondling or kissing you without your consent. It can include visual behaviour such as somebody exposing him/herself to you. In some places, a verbal threat to rape or sexually assault you constitutes an assault.

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If you just don't feel right about a massage experience, please contact me today!

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